When we begin to think we have to be the cleverest person speaking, I think we have begun to shift from being heart-centered to being mind- and ego-centered. Our conversations about Buddhism are not about twisting someone’s mind or thinking to be in line with our own. That is not fully being respectful of the person to whom you are speaking. When it becomes your desire to outwit someone then it is creating a dynamic of power­over and not power-with. The Lotus Sutra replaces the power­over dynamic of a teacher who has all the answers but does not reveal them. The Lotus Sutra presents us with a power-with where the Buddha says here is everything you need to know to attain enlightenment equal to all Buddhas.

Our most effective strategy should be to determine how do we benefit and cause the person the most joy.